


Pirates Ahoy!

by Mantykora



Series: MadaTobi Week 2018 [7]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pirate, Day 7, Free Day!, Humor, M/M, MadaTobi Week 2018, swashbuckling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 15:37:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17246831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mantykora/pseuds/Mantykora
Summary: Pirates ahoy! Or: captain, put on your pants.





	Pirates Ahoy!

**Author's Note:**

> MadaTobi Week 2018 - Day 7 - Free Day!

The upper deck was full of frantic shouting, clanging and stomping. A deck below the ongoing chaos, Tobirama hurried with unwrapping the tight knot that held a small life boat up the ship's flank.

A soft swish from behind was his only warning before a knife sailed past his ear, ripping off a tuft of white hair and cutting into the wooden beam a spare inch away from his face. Tobirama jerked away from the task at hand. For a moment he couldn't do anything else but watch in mute surprise as the stray strands of his hair drifted down to the floor.

Despite the narrow miss, the throw proved to be well-aimed. The blade cut through the main support rope that kept the small life boat up. The vessel rocked sideways and the pulleys whined from the stress of the sudden shift in weight before finally giving up. The small boat plummeted down into the sea below, taking away Tobirama's means of escape straight to the bottom of the ocean. Thankfully, he had let go off his end of the rope in time or else he would have suffered some serious rope burns.

Tobirama whirled around to face the preparator. "Izuna Uchiha," he snarled at the sight of a slender man standing in the entrance to the ship's boat bay.

The man hadn't change much since the last time they saw each other. The younger Uchiha brother still looked like a cocky peacock with a questionable fashion sense. Izuna still wore his hair in a loose horse tail and favoured an attire full of blitz and leather.

A tacky chain of colorful beads entwined into one of his side bangs was a new addition, however.

"Tobirama Senju," the other man greeted him with a cocky tilt of his head. "My hearing didn't mislead me. There was a rat scurrying around and trying to escape the sinking ship."

Tobirama scowled at the poor attempt at a quip and seized up his old-time rival. He noted that despite the stench of gunpowder and blood accompanying Uchiha's arrival, the man's clothes looked almost pristine. As if he hadn't had to fight his way through the enemy lines to get here just a few moments ago.

Izuna Uchiha was the second-in-command of the pirate ship _Sharingan_. The ship's call card was the red color of its sails that made it recognizable from leagues away. That was not the only thing the ship and its crew were infamous for, though.

The moment the ship had appeared over the horizon line Tobirama had taken necessary steps to ensure his safe get away from the transport ship he was traveling on. The illegal cargo the ship was smuggling and his less than voluntary stay on it notwithstanding.

Tobirama had a distant hunch that he and his possession might have been the reason behind the attack (they _were_ the reason he was taken in in the first place after all). Since the enemy of his enemy mantra was not the case in this situation, he had taken some measures to leave the ship in the commotion that would follow the boarding. While the pirates and smugglers would be too occupied with each other, he would sneak away unnoticed. He only needed to bid his time until the smuggler's ship would find itself closer to the nearby atol. From there Tobirama would be able to safely travel further away since these small islands were a part of busy merchant routes.

Yet to his recent, seemingly never-ending streak of bad luck, Tobirama had to postpone his plans for escape and focus on the problem at hand. Namely, one Izuna Uchiha who looked ready and more than willing to inflict some bodily harm on his person.

Some people hung up on old grudges a little too tightly in Tobirama's honest opinion.

The pirate pulled out his sword and took a fencing stance. There was a savage glint of excitement in his eyes at the thought of long due retribution. Tobirama did not remain impassive for very long, either, and drew his own sword. They crossed the distance in a few short steps and clashed in the middle of the catwalk.

Izuna was a very good fencer, but so was Tobirama. While Uchiha was nimble and light on his feet, he had the advantage of further reach and more strength to his slashes. He did not let himself let his guard down, however, because more than all of that Izuna was a very tricky opponent. The man had an annoying ability to slip between the cracks in one's defences to deliver shallow biting cuts that had the potential to end up deadly. If one still had any doubts about Izuna's fighting prowess, the man's still unblemished face was the testament of his skills.

They moved in a well-practiced tandem and their past resentments fueled the intensity of the duel. They parried, dodged and slashed, waiting for a slip in the other's guard. When the initial exchange yielded no favourable outcome to any of them they separated with a parting slash, silently planning their next move from a small distance away.

"Izuna, I'll take over!" a deep voice interrupted their stare-off as a third party made his appearance on the other side of the bay.

As one they turned to the new arrival and Tobirama cursed under his breath. For up on the steps stood none other than Madara Uchiha, the first captain of the Sharingan. Tobirama did not fail to notice that, as usual, the bastard wasn't wearing any proper shirt. One would think that a man in his position could afford a proper garderobe.

"Madara, I see that your sense of dress hasn't improved at all," he said as much.

"I am wearing a shirt!" Madara growled, gesturing toward his open linen shirt that barely stayed on his body.

Senju and Uchiha brothers shared a tumultuous history. It all started when Hashirama in a surge of teenage rebellion decided, to the chagrin of Bustuma Senju, to abandon family fortune and live a life of liberty, unconstrained by the demands of higher society. Thus he drafted himself on a merchant ship of questionable reputation. That's where he met Madara Uchiha. It was the start of a beautiful and forever friendship capable of overcoming societal differences and numerous dangers. Joined by declarations of brotherly love and loyalty and sealed by their matching tattoos-

At least Madara got one right before Hashirama ditched their partnership, eloped with a foreign princess and returned home with vast riches to found his own armada named _Konoha_.

As the old saying goes hell hath no fury like an Uchiha scorned. The matters devolved rather quickly from there. At some point in time Izuna ran into Tobirama's sword, Madara started his life of piracy, stole the _Kyuubi_ from the admiral's own fleet and declared war on everything Senju. In the end the _Kyuubi_ sunk, Madara lost an eye and Hashirama lost a friend.

Time healed most wounds, however, so after a while Madara moved on. And in time became known as the madman searching for the legendary infinite treasures of Tsukuyomi. Something that caused him and Tobirama to cross paths quite often.

Back in the present, Tobirama weighted his options. While he stood a decent chance against Izuna, should Madara join the fight he would find himself both outnumbered and outmatched. A situation Tobirama didn't look forward to, considering that Izuna hated his guts and Madara... Tobirama wasn't certain what exactly were the intentions of the older man toward him. Half the time he couldn't tell whether the man wanted to kill him or kiss him. Regardless, the stand off had to be resolved before Uchiha brothers decided to form a tag team.

A quick glance around the deck let Tobirama assess his situation. Madara was still on the other side of the catwalk. That meant that Tobirama still had some time left to somehow ditch Izuna and get off the ship before Madara would get around the entire floor. If he did not make it in time there was always an option of taking Izuna hostage and bargaining his way to freedom. With his resolve strengthened by the plan, Tobirama shifted his focus on the first step of the plan: subduing Izuna.

As it turned out in the next moment, Tobirama had needlessly bothered with any plan. Because Madara, as it was in his custom, chose to ruin it without even trying (or thinking for the matter).

Without further ado Madara vaulted himself over the railing. Using the nearest crossbeam to push himself further toward the low-hanging rope, he swung himself like a monkey over the extent of the drop and somersaulted on the catwalk landing right between him and Izuna with a cocky smirk.

In all these acrobatics Madara's shirt slipped out of his trousers and was now hanging loose. Madara just shrugged it off the rest of the way. Tobirama and Izuna grimaced in mutual dismay. The sight of Hashirama's portrait tattooed on Madara's left biceps was not a thing one could ever get used to.

Completely unperturbed by the reactions Madara casually picked up his sword.

"Izuna, make sure that there are no problems on the upper deck," he ordered.

The order received a stink eye from Izuna, which Madara didn't notice at first being too busy eyeing up Tobirama. When the silence prolonged and Izuna did not budge, Madara finally turned toward his brother.

Tobirama watched the silent, but going by the constantly shifting expression, quite heated conversation between the brothers. Taking adventage of their inattention, he started to slowly inch his way toward the nearest bulkhead.

"I've got this," Madara finally declared in a tone that booked no arguments.

Izuna surrendered with an irritated huff.

With no new challange coming his way, Madara turned to Tobirama with a smug look on his face.

"Now where were we-?"

They both blinked owlishly at the empty spot that Tobirama stood at just a few moments ago.

"So I see you've got this," Izuna didn't wait to comment.

"Beat it, Izuna," Madara's snarled at the sight of the other's satisfied smirk.

"Aye, aye, captain," Izuna chirped mockingly before departing.

Madara tried to slap the little shit for his attitude on his way out, but Izuna easily dodged the attempt and even had the gall to cackle at his failure.

With one annoyance dealt with, Madara turned his attention back to the escapee. When their eyes met, Tobirama at least had the decency to act the part of someone getting caught.

"So that's how you want to play," Madara smirked under his breath before dashing after fleeting Tobirama.

They clashed with a ring of steel before Tobirama could successfully reach the bulkhead.

Tobirama took classes on fancing with some of the best instructors in the country. His skills earned him many prizes in official tournaments. But he never stopped on lauers and continued to studiously hone his skills during many of his voyages. Thanks to them, he managed to get himself out of plenty tight spots. However, this time it looked like he would have to up his game even more, because the one-eyed pirate was a damn good fencer.

Madara's flamboyant style did not take anything away from his efficiency. Tobirama found it immensly aggravating. There was no visible school to Madara's set of moves. The man almost danced on the tip of his toes. Despite the outer disarray of his technique, Madara had no problems parrying his strikes nor delivering connecting strikes of his own. To his greatest humiliation, at some point Tobirama had to concede the ground.

Madara's next slash got a little too close for Tobirama's comfort. He could feel the edge of the sword as it skimmed over his skin... In the next instant, the front of his shirt ripped exposing his chest.

Tobirama growled at the affront and the self-satisfaction that oozed of Madara's every pore in the light of his accomplishment. The man did not even had an ounce of shame not to blatantly oggle the revealed piece of flesh.

Their swordplay grew more heated after that. While indignity and anger spurred Tobirama to increase the tempo, the longer the fight continued the more Madara gained the upper hand.

Tobirama's next misstep cost him his leather belt in his trousers. And since his trousers were quite loose, Tobirama was caught in a bizarre situation where he had to decide whether he should parry Madara's next strike or focus on keeping his trousers on his ass.

In the end, saving his life over the sanctity of his modesty won over. Left unattended, Tobirama's trousers dropped to the ground leaving him in his underwear.

"That's one ugly pair of pants," Madara commented on his choice of undergarments.

"They're comfortable," he defended his choice.

Tobirama was granted only a moment to drown in embarrassment before Madara pressed on with his attack. His step back proved to be very unfortunate. His feet tangled in his pants and he tumbled back into the pile of supply sacks, dropping his sword in the fall. When he looked up he came nose to the tip of Madara's sword.

The smugness rolled down Madara's body in waves. Tobirama hated it no less than being at the mercy of the pirate.

Madara raised his eyebrow at his petualnt expression before playfully trailing his sword down toward the south regions of Tobirama's body.

"We did not find the artefact in the captain's room. As I see it there's only one place left it could go," Madara mused aloud, a lecherous smirk blooming on his face.

Sweat beaded across Tobirama's skin. He didn't know whether he should be cursing Madara's perverted mind or his cunning insight. The artefact _was_ tucked away in his underwear.

As the sword made his way down his torso, Tobirama made a half-aborted move to protest. Immediately the tip of the sword pressed against his soft underbelly and Madara gave him a warning look.

But instead of getting on and over with it, Tobirama's growing discomfort seemed to motivate Madara to prolong the torment. The tip of the sword started drawing loops across his stomach until it finally stopped at the band of his pants. Madara send Tobirama a truly wicked look before his face took on an overplayed look of concentration as he tried to come up with a way to remove them with his sword.

It was a moment of inattention which Tobirama choose to take advantage of. Since Madara seemed to have some sort of plans in regard to his person, he hoped that Madara put enough value in his family jewles not to be too willing to do them any permanent damage.

Tobirama drew a hidden dagger out of his sleeve and threw it at Madara's head. Instead of batting it away, Madara chose to only duck his head without moving the tip of his sword out of its precarious position. The dagger embedded itself somewhere off sight.

Madara tutted at him and without any warning pressed his sword through the fabric Tobirama's pants. Tobirama paled and held his breath in anticipation for the pain. Yet it never came. The sword found itself safely pressed into the metal of the artefact.

"Made you squirm, didn't I?" The pirate laughed. Tobirama didn't see _any_ humour in this situation.

Madara's laughter was interrupted by the whine of pulleys and the sound of a rope tearing.

"What the-?" Madara started, but did not get to finish because one of the supply bags hanging under the ceiling broke off and smashed into his head from behind.

The impact made Madara do quite a nice pirruette before, to Tobirama's dismay, he fell forward. In the next moment, Tobirama found himself with a lap full of a very handsome and very unconscious pirate captain.

Tobirama groaned in relief despite the heavy weight pinning him down. For a moment he was worried that he had misjudged his throw. But despite the delay his plan had worked. If one ignored some unaccounted for circumstances.

No sooner did he thought that he had to abandon his celebration, because Madara unexpectedly stirred in his lap. Tobirama cursed the man's thick skull and desperately tried to shove the man off himself before he would come around fully.

"Hey, beautiful," the man crooned the moment his eyes opened. A lopsided and I'm-not-really-there smile appeared on his face.

Tobirama raised an eyebrow at the strange display, but in the next moment his eyes were blown wide open when Madara climbed up and without preamble kissed him thoroughly. The kiss made Tobirama light-headed for a short second, because, _damn_ , the man was a very good kisser. Under different circumstances, he would not mind engaging in some heavy petting with a very fine male specimen. But he really did not want to be here when the man would finally come to his senses or worse Izuna came back, catching them _in flagrante delicto_. As if that little weasel needed any more reasons to come after his ass.

"Oi, Madara, get off me," he huffed, once Madara let go of his lips.

"Nope. 'M good," pirate replied and tried to kiss him again.

Tobirama dodged the sloppy attempt. Then, an idea crossed his mind.

"Madara," he said and once certain that he had the man's attention he purred seductively. "Come on, get up. We need to take off your trousers."

Madara visibly perked up at the proposition and hastily embarked upon a new task.

"Let me help you," Tobirama offered and unbuckled his belt, then he teasingly pulled it out of the loops. The trousers sled down a notch, revealing, quite invitingly, Madara's happy trail.

Tobirama swallowed hard and cursed any deity listening to for testing his resolve against such temptations.

When Madara completed the task, he returned to feeling him up. Tobirama stopped his descent with a kiss of his own and using the new leverage rolled them over. Madara did not mind the new development at all.

Once on top, Tobirama finished the kiss and before Madara could get grabby again he stood up. Since he now owned a new leather belt he started pulling up his pants.

Madara blinked in confusion.

"Hey, we were supposed to take off our pants," he protested and started to get up from the floor. His trousers sled further down when he stood up, but Madara managed to catch them just before they dropped all the way down.

Since it definitely wasn't Tobirama's luckiest day it the next moment the door to the room opened and Izuna walked in on them. Tobirama forgone the explanation of _it's not what it looks like_ , because going by the younger Uchiha's expression it would definitely not work. Instead he opted for buckling his trouser up faster.

"I knew it! You scoundrel, you were always waiting to steal my brother's virtue," Izuna shrieked.

"As if there was anything left to steal," Tobirama barked back.

In the meantime Izuna seemed to be experiencing a minor aneurysm. His expression shifted through a wide range of emotions: from second-hand embarrassment on catching his brother after apparently having sex, to murderous intent directed at Tobirama for stealing his brother's nonexisten virtue to exasperation at Madara on developing a new habit of loosing yet another piece of his wardrobe.

It appeared that Tobirama was not the only person having a bad day. And because he could, Tobirama leered in Izuna's direction before turning around and grabbing Madara to kiss him passionately. With a tongue.

Having done the deed, he released Madara and bolted in the direction of the nearby bulkhead shouting, "Bye!"

"Bye," replied a completely besotted Madara.

Izuna sputtered, caught deciding between trying to strangle Tobirama and his brother. Using his rival's distraction, Tobirama reached the wall and flung himself through the bulkhead.

Izuna dashed after him, but once he reached the bulkhead it was clear that Tobirama was way beyond his reach. Uchiha watched as Senju disappeared beneath the waves. For a long moment there was no trace of him until his head resurfaced a good distance away.

Since the object of his immediate suffering got away, Izuna rounded on the next best cause of his grievances.

"You took care of it. Hmm?!" he growled.

"Hmm?" Madara hummed in reply, totally unaffected by the entire situation that had taken place.

"Are you concussed?!" Izuna accused.


End file.
